I've decided to join a group of ladies at Mom's Toolbox to read the Bible from cover to cover in 90 days. I'm really excited about the opportunity. Each week I'll be posting my weekly update and letting you all know how I'm doing! If you want to join us click the button on the right side of my blog. We're beginning on Monday, January 3rd.
Life has been challenging lately, but God is faithful. I'm really excited to read the Bible straight through like this and gain some context.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Life
So, in the time since my last post (which has been quite a while) we've experience the "darker" side of life. The side no one wants to talk about and it doesn't look very pretty. I've really been struggling with it all and decided this would be a good place to talk about it, (I'm not sure who reads my blog anyway).
On the 13th of July I had the follow-up ultrasound I talked about in the last post. As soon as it started I knew something was wrong, I didn't see the normal movement. I laid on the bed for what seemed like an eternity, silently pleading with God, that I wanted this baby so much and I couldn't understand, please fix it. Then the tech left to get the Dr. He still hadn't said anything was wrong, because he can't ...
This is when the story gets worse, Gerad didn't know what was going on, after the tech left I remember saying to him coldly, "I don't think the baby is alive." Everything else is a blur, the doctor came in and told us that we'd miscarried and gave us two options, to go through labor or have a D&C. We left the doctors office and went to the dikes, I didn't know how I was going to face my children.
Once home, Gerad was my rock. He called everyone who needed to know and told them all and I just "lived" if you can call it that. The next day I went to the doctor for pre-op and then I had surgery on Thursday morning.
It's been over a month now, and now more than anything I wish people would ask how things are (and want a real answer, not the rehearsed one I give people), see my life has not continued, I haven't forgotten and just moved on. It's not something I can just "overcome with my faith." It's part of my life that I will contiue to live. God can help me heal and ease the pain, but I don't want it to go away, I don't want to forget my precious baby.
Now, I have no doubt God has His hand on me and has been shielding me from what could have been and the phyical pain I could have had. It says in Jeremiah 1:9 (paraphrasing) that God knows the plans he has for you, plans to prosper you and give you a hope. I don't feel that way all the time, but what I've come to realize is I will prosper through this and out of this ...
I've learned that miscarriage is something not talked about, at least not loudly. People don't know what to say, and those who have experienced it don't discuss it a lot because it brings up all the pain and memories for them. This is probably the most frustrating thing I've experienced. I feel so alone, yet so many women know how I feel and don't want to talk about it.
I now have two children with me and one who ran up ahead of us ... for that I am learning to be grateful.
On the 13th of July I had the follow-up ultrasound I talked about in the last post. As soon as it started I knew something was wrong, I didn't see the normal movement. I laid on the bed for what seemed like an eternity, silently pleading with God, that I wanted this baby so much and I couldn't understand, please fix it. Then the tech left to get the Dr. He still hadn't said anything was wrong, because he can't ...
This is when the story gets worse, Gerad didn't know what was going on, after the tech left I remember saying to him coldly, "I don't think the baby is alive." Everything else is a blur, the doctor came in and told us that we'd miscarried and gave us two options, to go through labor or have a D&C. We left the doctors office and went to the dikes, I didn't know how I was going to face my children.
Once home, Gerad was my rock. He called everyone who needed to know and told them all and I just "lived" if you can call it that. The next day I went to the doctor for pre-op and then I had surgery on Thursday morning.
It's been over a month now, and now more than anything I wish people would ask how things are (and want a real answer, not the rehearsed one I give people), see my life has not continued, I haven't forgotten and just moved on. It's not something I can just "overcome with my faith." It's part of my life that I will contiue to live. God can help me heal and ease the pain, but I don't want it to go away, I don't want to forget my precious baby.
Now, I have no doubt God has His hand on me and has been shielding me from what could have been and the phyical pain I could have had. It says in Jeremiah 1:9 (paraphrasing) that God knows the plans he has for you, plans to prosper you and give you a hope. I don't feel that way all the time, but what I've come to realize is I will prosper through this and out of this ...
I've learned that miscarriage is something not talked about, at least not loudly. People don't know what to say, and those who have experienced it don't discuss it a lot because it brings up all the pain and memories for them. This is probably the most frustrating thing I've experienced. I feel so alone, yet so many women know how I feel and don't want to talk about it.
I now have two children with me and one who ran up ahead of us ... for that I am learning to be grateful.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Gender Cake
So here I go and promise lots of pictures and blogging etc. and I haven't done anything in days :(
I was supposed to make a gender cake last week for some friends to announce if they were having a boy or girl (they didn't know yet either) and I was really excited ... then this baby decided to have some fun with me and I got to spend 4 days on the couch ... but we did get an ultrasound (pics to follow). (Congrats to Stevie and Hillary! It's a girl!) So my wonderful mom made the amazing gender cake for me while watching my kiddos and taking care of me. I am finishing the wedding cake this week, pictures to follow next week!
Here's some pics of "little Harris" at 10weeks 6 days, healthy little baby! We had some good "posing shots" as the US tech called them, but they didn't print correctly so we have these with the measurements on them. We get another one in about 4 weeks, because they are worried about "an abnormality in the baby's neck." As far as I am concerned ... it's teeny tiny, how could you possibly see the anatomy correctly now? Oh well, at least I get another ultrasound! :)
I was supposed to make a gender cake last week for some friends to announce if they were having a boy or girl (they didn't know yet either) and I was really excited ... then this baby decided to have some fun with me and I got to spend 4 days on the couch ... but we did get an ultrasound (pics to follow). (Congrats to Stevie and Hillary! It's a girl!) So my wonderful mom made the amazing gender cake for me while watching my kiddos and taking care of me. I am finishing the wedding cake this week, pictures to follow next week!
Here's some pics of "little Harris" at 10weeks 6 days, healthy little baby! We had some good "posing shots" as the US tech called them, but they didn't print correctly so we have these with the measurements on them. We get another one in about 4 weeks, because they are worried about "an abnormality in the baby's neck." As far as I am concerned ... it's teeny tiny, how could you possibly see the anatomy correctly now? Oh well, at least I get another ultrasound! :)
Monday, June 7, 2010
Kids!
I thought I'd do a new post to fill you in on the kids' newest accomplishments!
Benjamin is becoming quite the young man, he says the funniest things, and speaks as if he was 10. Kathy was asking him his favorite thing from Hawaii and he told her it was the shower ... He really enjoyed the shower to rinse off the sand by the ocean. They had a short one to wash your feet except it was the perfect size for him ... he would push it and get his swim shorts just soaked and then bend over and wash his hair. He was under the impression he should take a shower, that's what you're supposed to do, right?
Corbynn is getting really big. She just recently started pulling herself up, on EVERYTHING in the house. Today she fell because she couldn't keep herself up on the oven. She's got quite the independent personality (I don't know where she could possibly get that). She also really enjoys eating! She's only got two bottom teeth, but don't deny her food. All she wants is table food and if she's not eating what we are I spend the meal dodging her dirty looks. She's got such a personality for 11 months old.
Benjamin is becoming quite the young man, he says the funniest things, and speaks as if he was 10. Kathy was asking him his favorite thing from Hawaii and he told her it was the shower ... He really enjoyed the shower to rinse off the sand by the ocean. They had a short one to wash your feet except it was the perfect size for him ... he would push it and get his swim shorts just soaked and then bend over and wash his hair. He was under the impression he should take a shower, that's what you're supposed to do, right?
Corbynn is getting really big. She just recently started pulling herself up, on EVERYTHING in the house. Today she fell because she couldn't keep herself up on the oven. She's got quite the independent personality (I don't know where she could possibly get that). She also really enjoys eating! She's only got two bottom teeth, but don't deny her food. All she wants is table food and if she's not eating what we are I spend the meal dodging her dirty looks. She's got such a personality for 11 months old.
Here we go again!
So, I've decided that I do like blogging, (if you could how many blogs I follow you would believe me) problem is, I'm not very good at keeping up with my own blog. I'm here to try again! I promise more pictures, because the more I read blogs, the more I realize the pictures make it much more fun!
We are expecting another 'little Harris' in December and I figured since I already have this blog I should use it to record this pregnancy, especially since my last I hardly got any pics of me and it just passed by so quickly. My official "estimated due date" is December 31, 2010. With the history of Ben and Corbs I'm hoping to go full term, 37 weeks, which is December 10th. I had my first appointment on the first of June. (It was the boring one with the nurse where they just get your history ...) My next appointment is the 23rd of June and I'm excited to hear baby's heartbeat and know all is well.
We've been really busy lately and it's only going to get worse! We've got double weddings this weekend with Gerad's Photography and next weekend our dear friends Jeremy and Kathy are getting married. I'm making there cake so I'll post some pictures in a few weeks.
Even though we're going to be busy, I'm going to be posting more ... It's a goal of mine, some "mom time!"
We are expecting another 'little Harris' in December and I figured since I already have this blog I should use it to record this pregnancy, especially since my last I hardly got any pics of me and it just passed by so quickly. My official "estimated due date" is December 31, 2010. With the history of Ben and Corbs I'm hoping to go full term, 37 weeks, which is December 10th. I had my first appointment on the first of June. (It was the boring one with the nurse where they just get your history ...) My next appointment is the 23rd of June and I'm excited to hear baby's heartbeat and know all is well.
We've been really busy lately and it's only going to get worse! We've got double weddings this weekend with Gerad's Photography and next weekend our dear friends Jeremy and Kathy are getting married. I'm making there cake so I'll post some pictures in a few weeks.
Even though we're going to be busy, I'm going to be posting more ... It's a goal of mine, some "mom time!"
Monday, January 18, 2010
Baked Oatmeal
I found this recipe at Finding Joy in my Kitchen. I've adapted it a bit to make it have less cholesterol and sodium as we are trying to eat healthier.
1/2 C brown sugar
3 C quick oats
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 t salt
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1 C lowfat milk
1 tsp. vanilla
1 apple, pureed or 1/2 Cup applesauce
2 eggs or 1 egg and 2 whites, slightly beaten
Mix the dry ingredients together in a bowl, and then the wet in another. Slowly add the wet into the dry. Once all are combined pour into a greased 9x9 pan and bake for 30 minutes at 350 degrees.
I cut it into 9 squares and had two for breakfast (Ben ate 1). We shared a container of yogurt. It was really good with the yogurt on top! If you like cinnamon, you might want to add more...
They have approx 162 calories for one square ... A decent breakfast! Hope you enjoy!
1/2 C brown sugar
3 C quick oats
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 t salt
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1 C lowfat milk
1 tsp. vanilla
1 apple, pureed or 1/2 Cup applesauce
2 eggs or 1 egg and 2 whites, slightly beaten
Mix the dry ingredients together in a bowl, and then the wet in another. Slowly add the wet into the dry. Once all are combined pour into a greased 9x9 pan and bake for 30 minutes at 350 degrees.
I cut it into 9 squares and had two for breakfast (Ben ate 1). We shared a container of yogurt. It was really good with the yogurt on top! If you like cinnamon, you might want to add more...
They have approx 162 calories for one square ... A decent breakfast! Hope you enjoy!
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